I deserve a medal!

I do.
And it shall say "Murphy fucked with me! But I WON!"

OK a bit extreme, but what a fucked up week.

Yes it is only Monday, but I'm counting the last 7 or so days....memory is a bit blurred, so not sure what happened when, but it WAS in the last week.....Things happen in three's right? I am posting this while pummeling myself against my wooden furniture, just so I don't jinx myself!

1.We FINALLY got some sunshine, so I decided to mow the lawns.
Bring out the whipper snipper, bring out my 'instructions" cos it's been a while...the mother fucker won't start!
My arms are weak and shaky, so I kick it! My elderly neighbour calls over the fence that she will excuse me if I swear 'because THOSE things are a SHIT to start!"
I can't laugh...I am too pissed off....my shoulder feels like it is dislocated....now I can't swear, because I don't like having permission to do so!
Then I notice the pump thingamajig is cracked, and is leaking petrol....DUH! (Just remember I have been pulling on this fucker on and off for over 2 hours....I hurt!)
But I get a glimmer of hope and pull out the yellow pages.
Ring the local mower repair dudes.."Is it just the pump thingamajig?"
ME: "I assume so...started fine last time"
Mower repair dude: "Easy...bring it in we'll fix it! $10"
ME: "You for real??? be there in 5!"
I shoulda fucking known better.
Long story short.. pump thingamajigs gone...inner tube thingamees gone...carburetor gone....will cost almost as much to fix it as it will to buy a new one..

Of course it will!
Bundled the pulled apart bits in a bag, tied it to the handle to offer the God...ahem...I mean AH.
My fix: poison all the edges! Borrow the neighbours whipper snipper for bits I can't poison!
DONE...fuck you! Murphy!!!!

2. My vacuum has had some issues of late, like smelling of fire, black puffs of dust/smoke/NFI coming out, not sucking etc. I tried to fix him. Thought it was the filter, cleaned both of them and put them back, changed bags, cleaned all the nozzles, fixed all the attachments etc etc.
Turned it on with hope of AT LEAST doing the floor rugs.....its not doing much at all...and the smell is BAD!!! Turn around and the mother fucker has smoke billowing out of it!!!!
So i throw it out the back door....and I SWORE LOUDLY...because nobody gave me permission to!
My fix: Pretty lame, I WILL miss the vacc...but we have NO carpet except two floor rugs, so I CAN sweep. I HATE sweeping...BUT I CAN! Or maybe it's time to teach the kids! I also have a Carpet sweeper which isn't too great but is better since I found the main problem...HAIR!!! LOTS OF HAIR!!! No pets! I shed hair like no one else...seriously...I am surprised I am not bald the SHIT gets EVERYWHERE! So regular defuzzing of Carpet Sweeper is also needed. Done! Not happy...but I will SURVIVE Murphy...YOU hear that?!?! MOther FUcker!

3.My fucking washing Machine bit the dust this morning! It too has been behaving badly of late...beeping at me constantly to manually fill it one day, then running perfectly the next. This morning though it did not sing it's familiar melody, it changed. Also the familiar lights were not flashing asking for cold water, or load readjustment....no blinking at all...just 4 random lights shining up at me, taunting me! Found the manual to decode it's foreign language...all it said was 'call a repairman'. Well I've tried that before and it didn't fix things...so I SWORE at it (again without permission) & kicked it several times.
My fix: Then I looked at renting one....$12 a week minimum for a 5.5kg used machine for 18 months!
So I went to see if I could get 'interest free' credit.
Got approved for $1000 which is about $20 a week.
And got myself a NEW & SHINY 8kg water efficient machine that I will OWN in 1 year. My last machine lasted me 10 years, so am hoping this will do the same...HAPPY! PLUS I will get $150 rebate WOOT! And I just LOVE me some new shiny white goods :D

But it is a bit sucky that I couldn't get finance for DD's op but I could for a washer! But I guess that is the way of the world huh! Maybe we need interest free finance on medical needs!!! Now there's an idea!

Ooh and on other news....
I did text the AH "you FORGOT to drop of DS footy boots" and left it that...heard nothing...surprise, surprise! Finally set the Wii up for the kids and he had also *FORGOTTEN* the Wii mote....so DS rang him to tell him & he dropped them both off Fri night.
I am not speaking to him! Not in a "Silent treatment" fashion or "playing games", just I can't be fucked wasting my breath, and playing games & waiting to see what mood he is in at any given time. He basically ignored me first time I saw him next after the outburst...which was fine by me. Second time he tried putting on the friendly, nice guy act....not buying it...'Hi, here you go, kids need/want/ have xyz, seeya!'

Pfft! I have a spy on my side. I KNOW what he does, what he says, and I know what I see, the 2 are astonishingly different....

He's trying to play, and I am, now, choosing not to :-)

K

And he's still barking!

I did fuck up though.
I accidentally packed 1 of DD's shoes & 1 of DS's Oopsies!
The phone rang at 8am, I was still in bed so didn't answer it. If it was important, whoever it was would leave a message or call my mobile right? WRONG!

My mobile rings at about 11am, I saw it was the AH...
He's pissed!
Asked where I was this morning?
I lied and said I was out, I only did this because I realised it must have been him that called & because well, it none of his fucking business!

And then he starts on about the shoes, swearing, screaming and carrying on.
I apologised and said it was a mistake on my part.
But, as per usual, he only sees the world through his eyes. From his perfect self, who does no wrong, NEVER makes a mistake Oh No, not the Supreme Being that is the Arse Hat!

He was telling me how fucked up I am, that I need to get my shit together, how I am ALWAYS forgetting something YADA YADA YADA.

So I said "Excuse me, but I am not going to sit here and allow you to carry on, Goodbye!"
And hung up!
I don't think he heard me, but that's not my problem.

What he did, faced with a shoeless child, rather than phone & leave a message, or do something 'normal' like call my mobile, I live close to the school so it would have added another 5 minutes to his trip. Or even send her to school in her normal school shoes. No, he took her to the shops, bought her new shoes, took her to school late, got to work late...AND then rings me to hurl abuse. He's such a clever man!

He tried ringing me after I hung up, I ignored it, then sent him text, telling him to remember HE isn't perfect, HE forgets things & basically to get over himself, and direct his abuse elsewhere.

He has dropped the kids stuff off. He didn't knock & I didn't go out.

But guess what?
Somebody FORGOT to pack DS footy shoes.
Hmmm wonder who that could have been. Certainly NOT the perfect specimen of Human life.

I really want to ring him and hurl abuse about it. But that's not me.
Maybe I'll send a text.
Or maybe I should go buy new footy boots then ring him and blame him.
Yep...that makes much more sense!

K

Fuck him & the dog he rode in on!

Yeah I know it's supposed to be horse, but dogs don't ride horses...they ride dogs!

Oh and if you haven't figured it out, this is going to be a rant! So feel free to leave at any time!

The fucking ARSEHAT is pissing me off soooo much ATM, he gets me so fucking angry I shake & just want to wring his fucking steroid enhanced fat fucker neck!

He has the kids tonight. We still exchange "stuff" because even though he has clothes there, we still need to exchange School clothing & the kids security stuff (blankies, teddies etc). On Wednesdays we don't bother with toys etc, leave that for the weekend, when we need to go to each others places anyway.

Anyhoo, I get a call at just after 6.30pm...
AH: "Hi, it's me, I need to drop down and get undies"
Me: "Oh, you don't have undies?"
AH: "No (insert smug tone) can I come down?"
Me: "Yeah of course, I'll give you a handful, I thought you had clothes and everything"
AH: "I do! but not undies!"
Me: "OK, see you soon, bye!"

I should have just said right there and then...."go buy them some fucking undies"...but I'm afraid I'm not quick on my feet like that.
Or I should have said "When will you be here?" because he has a tendency to NEVER fucking stick to a time....but I'm afraid...some lessons I am learning the slow way.....WAYYY tooo farking sloooowwwwww!

So I sit, and I wait, and I watch some TV, and have a drink, have a few ciggies...la dee dahhhh.
I remove evidence of what I was doing, nothing naughty or abnormal, just I prefer to keep my ME time to me IYKWIM. It is MY night off right???

Then it hits 7.45pm, and I'm kind of panicking, a lot annoyed, and very curious as to where he is.
And I need cig's.
He lives 10 mins away...15 max in peak hour....if you are popping in, would that not infer you are coming sooner rather than later? If you had planned on doing things PRIOR to popping over, wouldn't you give notice to the person...I dunno...like I'll be about an hour...or we have to eat dinner, have showers, THEN we will 'pop' over?? Heh, common courtesy is rare these days...maybe I am too optimistic! Especially seeing he is the most self righteous, egotistical, fucking soft cock that has ever adorned this planet earth!

So I ring both his mobiles...no answer! So I send him a text " I need to go to the shops, won't be long"

So I duck out, shops aren't far...my phone rings... I scramble and miss it, but see it was him, so I continue. Then I call both mobiles again...straight to voicemail....leave a msg...saying I missed your call but where are you and what is happening? He phones me and starts going OFF fucking this fucking that, what the fuck you going to the shops, fuck you, fuck this, fuck that.....I'm reeling...

Me: "Excuse me!...where are the kids while you are going off?"
AH:"Oh...in the next aisle" bullshit!
Me: "You rang OVER an hour ago saying you would 'pop' in"
AH: "WE HAD TO FUCKING EAT DINNER AND.." (yes, he was screaming at me)
Me: "Yeah ease up! You could have had the courtesy of telling me, I had to go to the shop, you hadn't shown up, so I had the courtesy of sending you a text, to let you know I wouldn't be far in case you decided to show up!" Fucking ARSEHAT!
AH: "Fuck, well we're at the fucking supermarket now, and I have to fucking buy them fucking undies"
Me: "Good for you" Fuck off cock sucker!
AH: "They'll call you when we get home, and we have to discuss E's lunch!"

Yeah well I just hung up then & screamed at the phone!
Then came on here!
Then the kids rang to say goodnight.
Then AH got on the phone to 'discuss' E's lunch, nice as pie of course...possibly because YET AGAIN he is swapping our days, times..to suit him!
(Yet he is telling OTHERS the opposite...but as usual I'll leave that for another post....possibly titled Stalker #2 = Double Agent)

OK I have cooled off a tad now, but now he has ruined my night, I was gung-ho into my Feng Shui stuff when he first called, then packed it away (that's my little obsession ATM).... I know I shouldn't and I guess more time will change that side of things....but I'm really pissed! If I ran out of undies....would I call him???? I don't call him for shit! Yet he deems it fine to call me for anything....maybe I need to tell him that...again! I get 2 nights off a week....he gets 5! I don't call him, if he has a problem DEAL WITH IT!


Oh and a small disclaimer: my keyboard is fucking up majorly...I thought I was typing bad the past week or so, but realised my keyboard is the issue, so if there are really bad grammar errors I apologise (knowing full well I have grammar trouble at the best of times)

I'm off to pull out my feng shui again.
K

Update on DD and the op.

Thanks for all the replies :-)
Kelli ~ I checked with the tax office and it worked out to be a couple of hundred, not enough to REALLY make a difference. But IF we do end up paying for private, I will still claim it, of course.
Bettina ~ What is this family allowance advance you speak of????

I am in a bit of debt at the moment, nothing outlandish, but enough to make saving hard without skimping on the payments there IYKWIM, so I decided to ask for the extra credit and let the gods decide.....I was declined...so option 3 is out. (I wasn't surprised, but thought it was worth a go).

What I am going to do is get her on the Public Waiting List. A lovely girl I met thru Plurk has given me an ENT, whom she highly recommends, so I will call tomorrow and try and get an appointment.

I did mean to do it today, but I've been raging a battle against my whipper snipper, and well time got away from me. (And the fucking whipper snipper won!!! If you can call it a win when it is dead and in pieces!!! HA!!! TAKE THAT!!!)

Where was I?
Um OK...so next..

I will save what I can, whilst still paying off Mary, Bob & Jane, inform the AH what his half is and hope he does the same, and hopefully be able to get her the op sooner rather than later.

(and secretly pray the AH gets his bonus next quarter and offers to pay the lot, lol)

Of course, as Murphy is prone to do, she came in last night to my bed complaining of a sore ear, and her op was due today! So me thinks we may be back on the Merry-go-round sooner rather than later. (But I knew that didn't I)

Thanks again!
Let the savings begin! Just not this fortnight as I have to give a deposit to OOSH, and I don't want the gas disconnected either!

K

Bits & Bobs

Just a bit of a catchup today....

I cancelled DD's operation for tomorrow.

Shed a few tears....I wish money wasn't an issue.

I found out that we aren't covered for it by the Health Insurance Co, and I just don't have $1500 lying around at the moment. And that is just the hospital. Medicare will cover about $250 which doesn't even put a dent in it (I'll leave my rant about Scheduled Fees another time!).

Now I know I was ranting and raving about the AH and his issues with paying for the op, but that was when we only thought we had a gap/excess to pay, so I'm not being hypocritical (in my mind any way....if you disagree...shutup! cos I'm a hormonal bitch at the moment!). So now I am trying to weigh up what my options are. I am waiting on a quote from the surgeon, and I am trying HARD not to stress about it until I receive that.

Options for now...

1. Go see a different ENT that services the Public Hospital...the wait will be up to 8 months, only cost will be ENT's fee (about $180).
2. Wait until the money is saved to pay up front....I'm thinking about a 3 month wait, maybe less if the AH cooperates.
3. Try and get a higher credit limit & pay for it that way....this balances on whether I'd even be approved & hoping I get some back from the AH...this would mean the op could go ahead probably within a month.
4. Wait the 6 months until we are covered. I will have to check this though as it is classed as pre-existing, so the wait may be longer.

Now the only trouble with 1,2 & 4 is that we are heading into "sick season"....well we are in it already...and whilst DD hasn't been sick for about 3 weeks now, she is getting a cold, and going on past history this means she will be back on the Merry-go-round in no time. Which means time off school, truckloads of anti-biotics & well...she'll be sick, sick isn't nice. Also, because of her ears she has a hearing problem, she is not deaf, but she has to make a real effort to hear, especially in class, she misses things in general, and comes home tired and cranky.

It is hard to not get annoyed at her, but I know there is an underlying reason, so I try my best to be understanding...but MAN she can push my buttons. And then of course DS is going through a turd phase, so I get the guilts when I pull him up on things but not her. Plus I'm sure he notices, and possibly she does too, and there is no balance and very little peace! And then my brain feels like exploding! So her being NQR effects us all in some way, shape or form...there is more, but I'm sure you get the picture.

Gah! This post was going to be a catch up on a few things, but it seems I had more to say on this matter than I thought....I still haven't had my rant about AH re the above & some other matters, the Stalker#2, my mum, my dad and other stuff....Oh well, will leave them for another post, your eyes are probably bleeding after reading this much.

But I'll leave you with a question....

What would you do out of my options above??

Or can you think of another option that I haven't?

K

**Edited to add: How's this for timing, the ENT surgeon just rang to tell me his costs. He's just lovely, another reason I don't want to go Public (The public ENT was an arse hat!), he alo told me to check out the ATO website as I may be able to claim on tax, as well as medicare, looks like the housework will have to wait, I have more research to do!

Holy Cow Batman!

I got a job!

A get up at a god awful time, shower & dress in something decent, brush my hair, use concealer & mascara, get kids organised & to school on time or earlier, go somewhere else & get paid JOB!!!

FUCK!!!!

What is the world coming to!!!

And to top it off it starts off as full-time! Talk about throwing ones self in the deep end!

Let's hope I don't drown!

FUCK!

A job!

I get paid to sit on my arse & answer phone calls & speak to people.

Have I mentioned my phone phobia?

FUCK!

I need to get the kids up & at school an hour earlier! I need to also be respectable for public viewing at the same time!

Have I mentioned I'm not a morning person?

FUCK!

Am I ready for this?
I'm not sure.

Are the kids going to fight me at every turn?
Probably.

Is the AH going to come to the party and step up to his responsibilities?
Probably not.

Am I going to drown in chaos?
Almost definitely...at least in the beginning...

So now starts a new chapter in my life.
It's been a long time coming.

I think it is either going to break me, or make me!
I sincerely hope it's the latter.

A job....in the real world!

FUCK!

K

DD's Op!?!?!?!

I finally had the chance to make the calls regarding the cost of DD's op.... news aint so great! The AH only updated the Health Insurance to cover Hospital as well in January, and because she has had grommets before, it looks like it is classed as pre-existing.

Maybe this was his concern at the start? Although why he didn't inform me of this I have No Fucking Clue!

By the time I had rung the Hospital a zillion times, the specialist, our GP AND the Health Fund....I got as far as it all not looking great! But I still have to ring the hospital & the specialist again...but after being out most of the day, I ran out of time, and they had all gone home. So I will try again in the morning. Cos I STILL DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH? They are very tight-lipped about cost when you say you are in a fund....and kind of send you on a trip on the merry-go-round....just to say "the gap is $xxxx" or "we are accredited with your fund so you pay nothing or a very minimal cost"....whilst on their admission forms it says you MUST pay up front and on admission.....I don't know what is going on in the health industry....but it's all a lot of nonsensical crud if you ask me, and they must all think we have VERY deep pockets to not need to know what we are up for!

Also I have *issues* with it being pre-existing.....her previous op fixed the problem! It was only when the grommets fell out she had problems again, and the adenoids are something new altogether....has never come up before. But I am guessing that it all falls too close to the 'line' and the insurance company would win!

Also they asked on the form for my Health Care Card/Pension number....so maybe I'll get a discount...but that, I think, may be extreme wishful thinking...

I guess it will all work out! At worst I will have to beg, borrow & steal..... but my lass will hear again sooner rather than later!

K

Catch-up! (and vent...oop where did that come from)

Had a busy week last week, with the course from hell, Dr's visits, and a job interview!

Yeah! Finally! Not entirely rapt with the job, and the more time that passes the worse I think the interview went, but it was an interview, so I'm happy with that. I didn't vomit, hyperventilate, swear, or say anything too stupid....so a Success! No matter what the outcome is! There have been a few jobs I've applied for lately that just seem ideal....so fingers crossed....speaking of fingers...I need to pull mine out and finish an application I'm half way through.....it's one of those tedious long and detailed pieces of shit that drive me up the wall!!!! But the job would be ideal!

I had my scan & follow up with my GP...not much to tell really....nothing is REALLY wrong...but nothing is really right either... My Gall Bladder is clear, apart from a small growth, which apparently I shouldn't worry about, and apparently shouldn't be causing my pain. There is a cyst on my kidney, which apparently is nothing to worry about, and apparently shouldn't be causing my pain either. My cholesterol is a bit off but again is apparently....well see above. My white cell count is a bit off....see above again. Some other levels are a bit off....again see above. So what is the outcome?
Keep taking the pills to help with stomach acid.
Stop drinking.
Eat healthier.
Exercise more.
Try and quit the fags.
Drink more water, less coffee.
Go back in 8 weeks and test again.
If pain continues go back sooner.
*Sigh* I feel like I've got fucking no where! So what did I do after my non-diagnosis?
I hit the town with an internet buddy that was visiting from another state and had a night of drunken debauchery, kissed a stranger, crawled in my door at 5am and slept till 2pm. It's not ALL bad.... I danced my arse off so that counts as exercise right??
Since then my self sabotage has kicked in full force....and I've been living on chocolate & lollies & softdrink.....which is just not like me....someone up there in my screwed up head is hitting the rebel button....you'd think at my age I'd be over that....but obviously not!

Onto other things...We finally had our appointment with the ENT for DD, and he's booked her in for grommets & a possible adnoidectomy. I didn't go the surgeon who did it last time....I took her to the Private Hospital. The ENT was gorgeous, and knew all about ED as his best mate in school had it....that was a nice surprise....mention ED and you normally get a blank look lol. But here's the shocker...she is booked in for the 18th of THIS MONTH! Fucking nearly fell off my chair!! It took over 6 months for the last op!
The ArseHat isn't happy though...of course, why would he be! When I told him, his only comment was that he couldn't afford it & that now she couldn't do swimming!!!
Fucktard!!!
The SAME man who has been quite vocal that "MONEY IS NO ISSUE WHEN IT COMES TO MY KIDS HEALTH!"
The same bloke who is back to his old drinking ways....What? $30+ a day.
The same bloke who is going Clubbing every weekend, so can't have the kids extra nights.
The same bloke who is back on drugs as well.
And the swimming comment?!?!?! WTF!!! Options...1: DD gets to go to swimming lessons once a week, she knows how to swim, it was just recreational. 2: DD stops having painful ear infections, fevers, further nose/throat problems as a result or ear issues, can ACTUALLY HEAR and participate in class properly AND learn, and stop missing school and life around her....hmmmm....You know he's right......very difficult choice....Moron!
I still have to chase up the exact cost, but it will get worked out somehow.
He fucking RILES me up! The amount of money he spent on fucking Hookers, the money he spends on the kids(bought them a Wii just for the hell of it), and everything mentioned above...How Fucking DARE he even THINK that he can't afford his half.....LET ALONE FUCKING SAY it out loud!

OK I weren't going to to do a psycho post....but well, it's out now....going to go SCREAM into my pillow or something now!
K

AH is a soft-cock! (And my tourettes finally came out)

I don't know if you recall, when I found out the AH had been visiting some fine establishments in the neighbourhood, and due to previous threats, I felt the need to keep my information to myself, for my own safety, until I had a plan....a plan to kick his arse to the curb...girlfriend! Oops sorry couldn't help myself on that last bit...and sorry for the wayyyy too long sentence.
Anyways if your memory is short....and I'm not judging all you 3 or 4 readers...as mine is abysmal...not even sure who i was just on the phone to....I digress... HERE is my post from wayyy back then ;-p

Well I had trouble....Homer Simpson trouble...I was never quite sure if I'd actually said "HOOKER" out loud....cos it was running thru my mind like a fucking tornado 24hours a day! But I had to keep things to myself.....NOT EASY!

But as I say... "It'll all come out in the wash"

And it did just recently.

The AH was here when he was in his uber-friendly-just-found-myself-a-bach-pad stage.
Couldn't have been more lovely, when our GP came up in conversation. (Who I'll just call 'Dr' here)
AH: "Go see Dr on Monday....he's an arsehole though"
Me: "I will, why is he an arsehole"
AH: "I got this rash....down there....so I went to see him...shaved my pubes and all"
Me: *starts giggling uncontrollably* "Why is he an arsehole?"
AH: "He lectured me about drinking....blah blah blah"
ME: *near fitting with laughter* "Ohhh I can't say it, I can't say it, I can't say it, I can't say it.."
AH *looks at me quizzically* "say what?"
Me: "...I can't say it....I can't say it....FUCK IT...yes I can......HOOKER!" *start roaring in laughter*
AH *trying to hide his annoyance* "I don't do that anymore...."
Me: " I don't care anymore" *Roaring in laughter still*

AH leaves!
LOL
Maybe his dick will fall off! But in the meantime it was nice to finally let it out!
K

Another quote....

...but from someone less famous...my dear old 7yo! and 6yo!

J: "Oh My God! I just had a heart attack!"
Me: "What? Why?"
J: "When we die, we don't come back!"

Then Forever optimistic DD pipes in...

E: "Oh of course we do, we have 10 lives!"

We then went on to discuss death. J has a fear of death, and it comes up often. E was working out how old God was....but was mixed up with Jesus....I think....I don't do religion, but I'm pretty sure Jesus would be 2008 years old...and god was never born, so has no age. J then piped up that he wished we could all live for 2000 years. I said it'd be pretty awful, as we'd all have no teeth, so couldn't eat chocolate & ice cream...and our bones & muscles would be mush so we couldn't do anything, and we'd have to wear nappies, and how enjoyable would life be like that?
E got it. J tried to devise ways to survive until 3000 years old.
We would all have our own personal nurses who would change our butts, feed us chocolate, and push us around in wheel chairs....
Worked for him!
Now he just has to convince the next 70 billion people born to train as a nurse so they can wipe their great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great grandaddies arse, and feed him molten chocolate thru a drip!

K

Quote of the week!

D "Hope springs a kernel"
A "No, I think it's 'hope springs eternal'"
D "No. Hope springs a kernel. Old farmer saying."

I love my Boston Legal!
K

Psychology 101

Today at "the course" we had a Psychologist visit and do a session with a group of us women on Self-esteem. Well I think that is what it was about. I pitied the psych....none of us wanted to be there, she was fresh outta uni, had a blessed up-bringing, and was faced with us.
Women who couldn't understand or speak English very well, us older birds who didn't care to divulge all our secrets, older women that seemed past it all, and the young Chickie's who "knew better".
She didn't have a hope.
She was nice enough though. But it always makes me laugh that these 'experts' of the mind quite often have no 'real' experience to back them up. One of the younger girls did not shut up for the whole session, and kept bursting into tears, and telling us all (strangers) the hardships of her life.
The psych kept placating her with textbook words, but she was obviously quite taken aback. A few times us 'older' ones, and I use that term loosely, meaning myself (29 again) and others older than I, had to explain to the psych what some terms meant....like disintegrate...WTF! I didn't need to do Uni to learn that one!
We did lots of written exercises, all of which I have done before.
Watched a video about depression, made by one of the anti-depressant drug companies. Fuck THAT made me laugh...."oooh you've got depression, take this pill and you'll be right as rain"...... The psych didn't get the joke!
In the midst of it all, we were instructed to write our names on an envelope, and then we all wrote a positive comment about each person and placed it in their envelope. Now given, most of us had never met before, and most did not speak throughout the session, this wasn't going to be easy. I had 'seen' a couple of them before. I had spoken to 3 of them before. I had spoken to only one of them to a point, that I felt I kinda knew her. And that was the one that kept breaking down crying.....which I had not seen in her before at ALL! Plus the 'psych' made a comment too.
BUT it IS nice to hear nice things about yourself.
And it is interesting to see what people think of you, having barely met you.
And it is FUCKING HILARIOUS too!
I tried to distinguish who's writing was who's quickly at the end, but as everyone was leaving, and a lot was going on it was a bit difficult....

So here are my 'compliments' from today....and my comments in brackets...
*You have a charming way about yourself. (Why thank you....I think this was from one I was sitting next to that I'd met before)
*Very warm & Friendly (thanks again....bit NFI who this was....could have been the woman next to me as well)
*You are soooooo beautiful and beautiful (ummmm yeah...NFI...but HOPE it wasn't the woman next to me)
*Smiling face, happy mother (better than crouching tiger, hidden dragon I assume)
*-Well balanced (I laughed out loud at this one and commented they obviously don't know me....then discovered it was from the Psych...oops....but point proven!)
-Thoughtful & reflective (maybe pensive & do not bare my soul to these people....with a touch of you HAVE NO IDEA!)
-Honest
*has a beautiful smile! (Uuum thanks....NFI again, and still hoping it wasn't the woman sitting next to me, and are we in lesbo support group or twat?)
*Friendly nice (I know...I know...stop it would yas!)
*You have beautiful skin (NFI but it was either someone NOT wearing their glasses, OR someone who could only write that sentence in English, as I think everyone got that one!)
*Quite (hmmmmm that's the only thing positive she could think of....unless she meant quiet....but either way....strange....quite what?)
*I love to have conversations with you & I think your a hot soccer mum :) (This was from the young crying chick....sweet...she really is lovely...naive & young & outspoken...but lovely....so this was my favourite! She has an interview tomorrow & I wish her ALL the best)

Okies off to poison my kids with fried rice....we're on a tight budget peoples....and they aint happy....I figure if I add as little flavour as possible they will eat it, and I will get by.
Have my Ultrasound tomorrow to see if it's gallstones...not convinced...although similar, not everything fits.

Until next time!
K

Somethin' stinks out there!!!

Ohhh mah lordy!!!
I just walked past my daughters room, and thanked the heavens I'd already done my nightly "thank gawd they're asleep, kiss & lights out" routine, cos holy heck the stench pouring out of that room is enough to singe the hairs between your cheeks!
My wee little 6 year old angelic girl farts like a fucking elephant that has been force fed chilli's and beans for a month! And she doesn't eat either!

On other news...the stalker was back last night....just as I was drifting off into lala land....I fucking hate that! I texted back in my haze twice....then woke up enough to realise what was going on & ignored the continuing texts & 1 phone call....that continued past midnight! Sheesh! Someone forgot to post the bulletin that "Ima single mum wiff tooo kids!" and once I have my pills I don't last for more than an hour....tops!

Finally went back to the dr today...he took blood *ick*...gave me some more pills...and sent me for an ultrasound....could be gallbladder....could be pleurisy...could be supercalafragalisticexpialidotius....sigh....will keep on keeping on.....and hope some energy returns!

Tomorrow is officially my last day of the 3 week course from hell....but unofficially I have 3 days to make up....and then officially I have to continue on twice a week until someone decides they are worthy enough of having me grace their premises each day to drink coffee & surf the internet....oh and pay me handsomely just for the privilege...HA!

I pissed AH off tonight, and his plans got ruined....not my fault, but I didn't cop any abuse either, so no news there either....yes....getting VERY worried.

Think my life is getting too boring!

Kids have been thrown into turmoil again, by the AH finding his very own bach pad, feels like we're breaking up all over again....rough times....but I'm sure we'll be OK....am enjoying the extra cuddles....even if I do get screamed at for an hour before hand....

Well that'll do me for now.....off to curl up on the lounge and listen to the rain for a bit before I head off to bed....oh and drink a gallon of water.....kind of did a bit of overkill on the chocolate & ice cream tonight...oops! Can anyone say gallstones? I don't seem to have issues at night though....knock on wood ;-p Oh and still can't get over my weight loss....2 belt holes in a month!!! Crazy I tells ya! Sure it won't last with my recent sweet tooth though lol.

K