I AM NEVER EATING CHOCOLATE AGAIN!
Give me wine, beer, Baileys (mmmm Baileys...), ANYTHING...I will drink fucking Rocket Fuel and enjoy the aftermath more!
Give me drugs....legal, illegal.....mixed with battery acid & 5 spice....it has got to be better!
I have felt like absolute crap for the past few days, have been skulling water like it's liquid gold.
Honestly! I didn't eat that much! But that is ALL I can attribute it to...the FUCKING chocolate!
I just want to spew, shit, cry, scream and rip my own limbs off!
The Farking White Wabbit has some answering to do!
Firstly....he fucking trashedthe joint! There was a white powdery substance EVERYWHERE, then after the kids demolished the place looking for eggs, there was teensy eensy bits of coloured foil all over the place, and brown smears all over the floors. Which I am honestly not sure if it was Bunneh Shit, Kid Shit or chocolate egg that just didn't quite make it in the mouth fast enough!
Secondly...my kids have been feral! I tried to get them eat it all in one day, to be over and done with....but Noooooo! I still have a FRIDGE.FUCKING.FULL.TO.THE.BRIM. WITH. CHOCOLATE!!!!
Thirdly...I was feeling the effects of chocolate overload, on SUNDAY, but kept being tempted! (Remember the Fridge, and I haven't mentioned the rest!) I HAVEN'T EATEN THAT MUCH...but it screws with me! Seeing it in the shops since christmas has made me eat it constantly! As in a little bit a day! But it's too much! Today I feel a little better, and I haven't had any...Proof enough! But it has STILL taken over my brain! I stand in the checkout queue and see alllll that chocolatey goodness, and WANT TO BUY IT! HELLO WOMAN, REMEMBER YOUR HOUSE IS ALMOST MADE OF THE SHIT!
I AM OVER CHOCOLATE!
And I STILL haven't opened the Fererro Rochers...hmmmmmm......If you had an AH, and that AH gave you your fave chockies, Would you eat them?
I'm not game.....
Plus chocolate is still EVIL!