Update on DD and the op.

Thanks for all the replies :-)
Kelli ~ I checked with the tax office and it worked out to be a couple of hundred, not enough to REALLY make a difference. But IF we do end up paying for private, I will still claim it, of course.
Bettina ~ What is this family allowance advance you speak of????

I am in a bit of debt at the moment, nothing outlandish, but enough to make saving hard without skimping on the payments there IYKWIM, so I decided to ask for the extra credit and let the gods decide.....I was declined...so option 3 is out. (I wasn't surprised, but thought it was worth a go).

What I am going to do is get her on the Public Waiting List. A lovely girl I met thru Plurk has given me an ENT, whom she highly recommends, so I will call tomorrow and try and get an appointment.

I did mean to do it today, but I've been raging a battle against my whipper snipper, and well time got away from me. (And the fucking whipper snipper won!!! If you can call it a win when it is dead and in pieces!!! HA!!! TAKE THAT!!!)

Where was I?
Um OK...so next..

I will save what I can, whilst still paying off Mary, Bob & Jane, inform the AH what his half is and hope he does the same, and hopefully be able to get her the op sooner rather than later.

(and secretly pray the AH gets his bonus next quarter and offers to pay the lot, lol)

Of course, as Murphy is prone to do, she came in last night to my bed complaining of a sore ear, and her op was due today! So me thinks we may be back on the Merry-go-round sooner rather than later. (But I knew that didn't I)

Thanks again!
Let the savings begin! Just not this fortnight as I have to give a deposit to OOSH, and I don't want the gas disconnected either!

K

Bits & Bobs

Just a bit of a catchup today....

I cancelled DD's operation for tomorrow.

Shed a few tears....I wish money wasn't an issue.

I found out that we aren't covered for it by the Health Insurance Co, and I just don't have $1500 lying around at the moment. And that is just the hospital. Medicare will cover about $250 which doesn't even put a dent in it (I'll leave my rant about Scheduled Fees another time!).

Now I know I was ranting and raving about the AH and his issues with paying for the op, but that was when we only thought we had a gap/excess to pay, so I'm not being hypocritical (in my mind any way....if you disagree...shutup! cos I'm a hormonal bitch at the moment!). So now I am trying to weigh up what my options are. I am waiting on a quote from the surgeon, and I am trying HARD not to stress about it until I receive that.

Options for now...

1. Go see a different ENT that services the Public Hospital...the wait will be up to 8 months, only cost will be ENT's fee (about $180).
2. Wait until the money is saved to pay up front....I'm thinking about a 3 month wait, maybe less if the AH cooperates.
3. Try and get a higher credit limit & pay for it that way....this balances on whether I'd even be approved & hoping I get some back from the AH...this would mean the op could go ahead probably within a month.
4. Wait the 6 months until we are covered. I will have to check this though as it is classed as pre-existing, so the wait may be longer.

Now the only trouble with 1,2 & 4 is that we are heading into "sick season"....well we are in it already...and whilst DD hasn't been sick for about 3 weeks now, she is getting a cold, and going on past history this means she will be back on the Merry-go-round in no time. Which means time off school, truckloads of anti-biotics & well...she'll be sick, sick isn't nice. Also, because of her ears she has a hearing problem, she is not deaf, but she has to make a real effort to hear, especially in class, she misses things in general, and comes home tired and cranky.

It is hard to not get annoyed at her, but I know there is an underlying reason, so I try my best to be understanding...but MAN she can push my buttons. And then of course DS is going through a turd phase, so I get the guilts when I pull him up on things but not her. Plus I'm sure he notices, and possibly she does too, and there is no balance and very little peace! And then my brain feels like exploding! So her being NQR effects us all in some way, shape or form...there is more, but I'm sure you get the picture.

Gah! This post was going to be a catch up on a few things, but it seems I had more to say on this matter than I thought....I still haven't had my rant about AH re the above & some other matters, the Stalker#2, my mum, my dad and other stuff....Oh well, will leave them for another post, your eyes are probably bleeding after reading this much.

But I'll leave you with a question....

What would you do out of my options above??

Or can you think of another option that I haven't?

K

**Edited to add: How's this for timing, the ENT surgeon just rang to tell me his costs. He's just lovely, another reason I don't want to go Public (The public ENT was an arse hat!), he alo told me to check out the ATO website as I may be able to claim on tax, as well as medicare, looks like the housework will have to wait, I have more research to do!

DD's Op!?!?!?!

I finally had the chance to make the calls regarding the cost of DD's op.... news aint so great! The AH only updated the Health Insurance to cover Hospital as well in January, and because she has had grommets before, it looks like it is classed as pre-existing.

Maybe this was his concern at the start? Although why he didn't inform me of this I have No Fucking Clue!

By the time I had rung the Hospital a zillion times, the specialist, our GP AND the Health Fund....I got as far as it all not looking great! But I still have to ring the hospital & the specialist again...but after being out most of the day, I ran out of time, and they had all gone home. So I will try again in the morning. Cos I STILL DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH? They are very tight-lipped about cost when you say you are in a fund....and kind of send you on a trip on the merry-go-round....just to say "the gap is $xxxx" or "we are accredited with your fund so you pay nothing or a very minimal cost"....whilst on their admission forms it says you MUST pay up front and on admission.....I don't know what is going on in the health industry....but it's all a lot of nonsensical crud if you ask me, and they must all think we have VERY deep pockets to not need to know what we are up for!

Also I have *issues* with it being pre-existing.....her previous op fixed the problem! It was only when the grommets fell out she had problems again, and the adenoids are something new altogether....has never come up before. But I am guessing that it all falls too close to the 'line' and the insurance company would win!

Also they asked on the form for my Health Care Card/Pension number....so maybe I'll get a discount...but that, I think, may be extreme wishful thinking...

I guess it will all work out! At worst I will have to beg, borrow & steal..... but my lass will hear again sooner rather than later!

K

Catch-up! (and vent...oop where did that come from)

Had a busy week last week, with the course from hell, Dr's visits, and a job interview!

Yeah! Finally! Not entirely rapt with the job, and the more time that passes the worse I think the interview went, but it was an interview, so I'm happy with that. I didn't vomit, hyperventilate, swear, or say anything too stupid....so a Success! No matter what the outcome is! There have been a few jobs I've applied for lately that just seem ideal....so fingers crossed....speaking of fingers...I need to pull mine out and finish an application I'm half way through.....it's one of those tedious long and detailed pieces of shit that drive me up the wall!!!! But the job would be ideal!

I had my scan & follow up with my GP...not much to tell really....nothing is REALLY wrong...but nothing is really right either... My Gall Bladder is clear, apart from a small growth, which apparently I shouldn't worry about, and apparently shouldn't be causing my pain. There is a cyst on my kidney, which apparently is nothing to worry about, and apparently shouldn't be causing my pain either. My cholesterol is a bit off but again is apparently....well see above. My white cell count is a bit off....see above again. Some other levels are a bit off....again see above. So what is the outcome?
Keep taking the pills to help with stomach acid.
Stop drinking.
Eat healthier.
Exercise more.
Try and quit the fags.
Drink more water, less coffee.
Go back in 8 weeks and test again.
If pain continues go back sooner.
*Sigh* I feel like I've got fucking no where! So what did I do after my non-diagnosis?
I hit the town with an internet buddy that was visiting from another state and had a night of drunken debauchery, kissed a stranger, crawled in my door at 5am and slept till 2pm. It's not ALL bad.... I danced my arse off so that counts as exercise right??
Since then my self sabotage has kicked in full force....and I've been living on chocolate & lollies & softdrink.....which is just not like me....someone up there in my screwed up head is hitting the rebel button....you'd think at my age I'd be over that....but obviously not!

Onto other things...We finally had our appointment with the ENT for DD, and he's booked her in for grommets & a possible adnoidectomy. I didn't go the surgeon who did it last time....I took her to the Private Hospital. The ENT was gorgeous, and knew all about ED as his best mate in school had it....that was a nice surprise....mention ED and you normally get a blank look lol. But here's the shocker...she is booked in for the 18th of THIS MONTH! Fucking nearly fell off my chair!! It took over 6 months for the last op!
The ArseHat isn't happy though...of course, why would he be! When I told him, his only comment was that he couldn't afford it & that now she couldn't do swimming!!!
Fucktard!!!
The SAME man who has been quite vocal that "MONEY IS NO ISSUE WHEN IT COMES TO MY KIDS HEALTH!"
The same bloke who is back to his old drinking ways....What? $30+ a day.
The same bloke who is going Clubbing every weekend, so can't have the kids extra nights.
The same bloke who is back on drugs as well.
And the swimming comment?!?!?! WTF!!! Options...1: DD gets to go to swimming lessons once a week, she knows how to swim, it was just recreational. 2: DD stops having painful ear infections, fevers, further nose/throat problems as a result or ear issues, can ACTUALLY HEAR and participate in class properly AND learn, and stop missing school and life around her....hmmmm....You know he's right......very difficult choice....Moron!
I still have to chase up the exact cost, but it will get worked out somehow.
He fucking RILES me up! The amount of money he spent on fucking Hookers, the money he spends on the kids(bought them a Wii just for the hell of it), and everything mentioned above...How Fucking DARE he even THINK that he can't afford his half.....LET ALONE FUCKING SAY it out loud!

OK I weren't going to to do a psycho post....but well, it's out now....going to go SCREAM into my pillow or something now!
K

Back on the medical merry-go-round..

Ever since E's grommets have fallen out, about 6-7 months ago, she has had constant ear infections....AGAIN!
Our weeks have gone like this...E complaining of something Not Quite Right....visit Dr "oooh yes her ears are quite red & there is a lot of fluid, here's some antibiotics, come back in a week or 2"....E's fine again, go back to Dr "yep, all clear"....a week later E complains of something Not Quite Right....visit Dr "oooh yes her ears are quite red & there is a lot of fluid, here's some antibiotics..." and well, I guess you get the picture.
In December I noticed she wasn't hearing too well. And it coincided with her ears again not feeling right....and about 1-2 weeks since her last dose of antibiotics. Seeing a pattern?
We were away, so we went to see the dr again once we returned home. This time we got a referral to get her hearing tested.
The appointment was made.
It finally came yesterday.....yep it took over 4 months just to get the test.
In between we have had the same cycle. Ear bad..take meds...ear good...finish meds...ear bad..take meds etc etc. Her hearing has come & gone....but mostly it's gone! But we waited patiently.
Test results from yesterday? She's deaf! OK not completely deaf, but she has about 50% hearing in her left ear & 60-70% in her right. It is all treatable of course but it's just the extremely long waiting game that drives me insane. The tester said she would be really struggling to hear in class, and if she's grumpy & tired from school that would be why. Well she's a right bitch after school! She has been struggling in class. Emotionally mostly, she's very clever. I had put most of it down to her dad & I separating.

Now once again I am fraught with feelings of inadequacy as a parent. Why didn't I put 2 and 2 together? J had the same issues...his hearing was worse...but he's had no problems since the grommets...or has he?

They both have speech issues that I don't even hear? The tester asked me how her speech was, I said fine...then she noted a lisp! What lisp? That's not a lisp, that's just E.
I know she has some small issues...like trouble with "Th" saying it "f"...but I did that as a kid! Plus with her ED and her lack of teeth, the spacing, size etc....I guess I put down any small differences to that!

So now I want to get J's hearing tested too...just to be sure....as it has been pointed out to me that he still speaks like he has adenoid problems...which were fixed nearly 2 years ago.....and as I am a bad mother, I don't notice and need these things pointed out!

AS far as E goes we are back on the merry-go-round. She is back on antibiotics, because her ears are infected again. And I called 5 ENT's and the earliest I can get in is June 6th.

Then What?

More Grommets?

I HATE having my kids put under....:-(...I sooo don't want to do that again! It was AWFUL! But at the same time why does the process take so fucking long! It's a joke! Once I finally get into the ENT it could take months again for the op....I think we waited 7 months last time...and we pushed it!

So in the meantime, we keep pumping in the antibiotics, which I hate, tell her teacher to speak in her right ear & sit her up the front of the class, and hope the child doesn't get any MORE screwed up & miserable!

K

Bow to my cake making prowess!

Yay it's party day!

Here's E's cake....

I think it was the easiest one I've ever done...she's happy, so I'm happy!

And J's from his 7th party in September.... (because I was a slack mum and never got around to posting it)

This was HARD...well more time consuming, than difficult. When I finished it I waltzed outside for a well deserved ciggie and glass of wine, only for AH to stick his elbow in Barts head!!!! Oooooh I was SUCH a happy camper THAT night! And apparently I had no right to go off...pfft...and trust me, I contained myself as the kids were around, so he got lucky, I didn't say a 100th of what I was REALLY thinking! I did fix it. But it was difficult as AH had a rare attack of domesticity and washed up all the icing bowls (you know the ones you keep in case of an accident)..... Positive is he isn't here to ruin this one ;-)

Best go, and get prettied up, need a coffee first.....

K

E's visit to the dentist

The dentist visit went GREAT!
Firstly, and of least importance, I WAS FINE. I really had to push myself to go, was convinced I would panic & make a fool of myself, and E would not be seen, but I did just fine.....I had
"moments" and the worst was picking them up from school early, and J having to pee in the carpark, lol...but another TADA for me.
The dentist visit itself gave some great results....but maybe some background info first.
E has Ectodermal Dysplasias (ED). It is basically a genetic disorder that effects the ectoderm (outer layer) of an embryo....you can google it, but she has a very mild form. It is still a bit of an unknown disorder, but generally effects skin, hair, teeth & nails. She was diagnosed when she was 1, and due to no history from either of us parents, it seems to be just a freak mutation at conception. We are blessed thus far, that her main problem is her teeth. They are conical shaped, and there was a big possibility that she would have next to no second teeth. Her nails are paper thin, and she gets a lot of those sores/cuts around the edge. She had very little hair, until about 18 months, but she now has a full head of the stuff :-) albeit thin & a little wirey & hard to manage. She has occasional skin issues such as excema....but considering some of these kids have no sweat glands...it is nothing, and fairly common these days. She has also had recurrant ear infections, and has had grommets put in her ears.....but so has my son, and he is not ED.
Anyways...back to the dentist. We go to the top paed dentist around these parts, and he is at Westmead Dental Hospital....due to both these things he is very hard to get into, but he is FANTASTIC! So after a long wait....and 2.5years since last seeing him...today was the day!
He checked her out, and then sent her for an x-ray. The last xray she had done she was quite young and wouldn't keep still, but it didn't look good as far as 2nd teeth go. But todays showed much better results....she is only missing her 4 bottom front (2nd/adult) teeth, and 2 incisors. Her 6 year molars are there waiting to come through, which he said looks positive as far as the older ones developing too. Her teeth are at the "age" of a 3.5 year old, which he said was not a worry. The ones, without adult teeth, were the best outcome, as their roots are long and could be built up to "look" more in place...and at a much later date, implants would work well. So at this stage we are doing nothing. We will have another appointment in a year. But if I feel something needs to be done (caps most likely) to call in the meantime. She apparently is called "shark-girl" at school...it breaks my heart...but, for now, it is more "cool" status. than teasing....we'll see how that goes...and I'll try not to be tainted by the tauntings I got at school for my teeth issues (which was dodgy dentist induced, NOT genetics......well actually a bit genetics, but not ED). At the moment she has been invited to just about every party happening, so as long as she continues to do well (and I know kids tease for anything and parties aren't the be all and end all) we will continue to go on as normal, and tackle things as they come :-)
Best get these kidlets to bed...and stop avoiding the housework :-)
K